Have you heard of "resting bitch face"? It means that when you're not actively pulling ker-azy expressions, you look like you're in a bad mood and kind of mean. Even if you're not. Well, I seem to have "resting sucker face". Yes, I am that one born every minute. I guess I'm just too nice and polite to say "no, thank you!" (it seems so easy just typing it out like that. And "no, thank you!" is also a very nice and polite way of telling someone to fuck off and I can't even do that). It's been a curse since I was young. I remember listening to a long telephone sales pitch about the benefits of a special women's health insurance and agreeing that it did sound great and I was very interested but did it matter if I was only 14? Fast forward a couple of years and my mum had to tell the Jehovah's Witnesses who popped around for a return visit that I'd suddenly gone to University in Manchester. Now in the States I've picked my habit back up. There seem to be more in-person cold callers / doorsteppers here than there were in England but maybe it's just because I am usually at home now. I now try and limit my interaction with the dreaded door knockers by just not answering the door anymore but in the past two years I have:
- signed up for a pest control service that we didn't want or need. I immediately emailed to cancel but the guy turned up the next day with his fluffy spider duster thing and I had to tell him that I had cancelled (he didn't seem that surprised) then listen to a heart wrenchingly sad message on my voicemail from the salesman who had originally signed me up.
- signed up for a milk delivery service that we didn't want or need. In my defense, the salesman was quite old and said "it's only milk" which made me feel momentarily better about the whole thing but we don't even drink that much milk! I also had no idea how many "gallons" we needed. I'm from England. We use pints. Plus US and UK gallons are different anyway. I canceled after two or three weeks as it was far more convenient just to buy some ad hoc.
- signed up for a financial advisor meeting that we didn't want or need. I then took the coward's way out (or is it a pro-tip?) and called their office late at night to be sure of getting an answer machine and left a cancelation message on that.